Transition and attraction
05/04/25 18:43 Filed in: Personal
I saw a recent response to a poll question years ago asking whether presenting as female changed members' views about men. It prompted very many responses. All the ones I read said yes, when I am dressed as a woman, I feel more like a woman and I am more attracted to men.
I feel differently about this. In boy mode I am heterosexual. I am attracted to women rather than men. It goes further than that: I much prefer female company to male company and I feel no attraction towards men whatsoever. I don't really get men as a concept although I accept that they are essential for reproductive purposes.
This doesn't change when I present as female. In fact I feel female inside all the time whether I am dressed that way or not. When out dressed I try to look as feminine as possible but I do not feel comfortable being stared at or even admired by men. I agree with the Danish artist Gerda Wegener (d.1940): "Women do not exist to satisfy the male gaze."
What would happen if I actually transitioned fully and had hormone replacement therapy? Would it make a difference if my hormonal balance changed from male to female? I know that HRT does produce profound changes in the body but I would like to think that my pro-woman mental framework was strong enough to resist that.
If I did transition fully, and I was single, I am sure that I would be looking for a relationship with a woman rather than a man.