Feminisation
17/09/24 13:29 Filed in: Personal
Being trans is primarily internal. It's about how you see yourself and the world. It's about your psychological, emotional, social, understanding of yourself. What you are like on the outside does not matter so much. But for some trans people, and I am one of them, it's very important to look feminine as well. And I don't just mean what clothes I wear. I mean in relation to my body.
No longer than this
The first step for me is to grow my own hair to what I would regard as a feminine length (above the shoulder will be fine) and to have it styled in a feminine way. I am getting there. It will be a few months before it's as long as I would like it to be. But I can start on the styling now. Yesterday I went to the hairdressers. For the first time, my stylist gave me a style that looks the part. It is exactly what I want.
The other essential for me is to get rid of that unsightly bodily hair. It is a curse of being biologically male that I have to shave regularly and also use make-up to conceal the male traces. What would life be like if I never had to shave and I could reduce the make-up to bright red lipstick? So much more convenient – and I would have so much more freedom to present as myself. How much am I prepared to go through to achieve this? A great deal.
So I have started a course of laser hair removal at my local beauty clinic. I won't pretend – this does involve short bursts of pain in the lower part of my face. But that soon wears off and the eventual result will be amazing. The clinic were very understanding when I came in and explained what I needed. The young technician treating me is gentle and kind.
The ultimate in feminisation is hormone replacement therapy leading towards surgical transition. This is not possible in my current circumstances. So I will have to do the best I can without it.